Goodbyes
by Cutecollie
Summary: Because I always knew Daphne would die from cancer. To every hello, there is a goodbye. Fraphne


**To every hello, there is a goodbye.**

**White floor. White ceiling. White walls. I was surrounded by a world of white, sensing nothing else but the chair beneath me, the white fan slowly whirling above my head, and the strong, sterile scent of cleaning supplies that had become all too familiar these past few months.**

**I sighed through my nostrils, heart longing for me to scream or at least hold my head in my hands as it ripped like it had been slowly ripping since I'd heard the news. Since we heard the news. My hand squeezed air, still not used to not having her hand to hold. I rested my hand on my head as I felt another migraine coming on, I'd had chronic headaches since…**

**My phone vibrated, but I ignored it. As it continued to buzz in my pocket, I glanced at it, wondering if it was one of the kids. We'd had four.**

**Edward was the eldest, I wouldn't let my beloved name him after me, Eddie was the closest thing to it. Blonde, clever, intelligent, **_**brilliant**_** Eddie, eyes bright, deep, glowing blue as the sky. A wise, protective, thoughtful, observant, cautious genius. Someday, he hoped to run my father-in-law's company. His wife Diana had just had a son last winter, they were his life, his whole world, the very things he lived for and loved above all else. I couldn't be prouder of him, or happier for him.**

**Then there was Liz, our Lizzie. Scarlet curls, impossibly beautiful as her mother, even more fiery tempered and stubborn than both of her parents combined, sweet, passionate, creative, bold, witty, gentle, loving, clever, and precious. She had her mother's bright, clear, soul piercing, crystalline, blazing, smoldering, brilliant, endless cyan eyes, the most beautiful things I'd ever seen. Liz was an artist, singer, and actress, majoring in both music and art.**

**Aiden was my second son, despite the fact we weren't related by blood. I'd known him since he was in his mother's womb, and he'd lived in our house more than his own, if he wasn't at school or sleeping in his own bed, he would be somewhere on our property. He had red hair and blue eyes **_**almost**_** comparable to Lizzie's, but even I had to admit he was the most good looking guy I'd ever seen. Eddie's best friend, he was as obstinately stubborn and fiery tempered as Liz, but also as passionate, sacrificing, fearless, bold, and loving. Liz and Aiden had been in love for years, even if they themselves didn't realize it yet. However, they were going to the same college so it was only a matter of time before one fiery argument and their blazing, clashing tempers created a ardent, pure, tender kiss. That wasn't the most relaxing thing for a father to know, and it had caused many sleepless nights for me, but Aiden was the one who came close to deserving my Lizzie. He **_**did**_**n't of course, but I didn't want her to be with anyone else but him.**

**Ellie had been our youngest. We had called her Ell, Ellie, or Ella. Sweet, innocent, imaginative, pure, animal-loving, compassionate, curious Ella… The world had been her playground and she was ecstatic to see every inch of it, awestruck by so many things we took for granted. She was the single most adorable, precious little angel to ever set foot on Earth. Liz would not only forgive me for saying it, but agree ardently, and she **_**had**_** been… well, reckless, impulsive, rebellious, impatient, and mischievous as a little girl. Her siblings had always been overprotective of their sister, Liz never let her out of her sight. Fair, baby smooth, flawless skin, heart-shaped, perfect face, huge, brilliant blue eyes identical to her mother's as well, soft pink, silken lips, ethereal smile, lustrous, flaxen curls that framed her face perfectly, so small… What I wouldn't give to hold her one more time, to kiss those baby curls, to watch her fall asleep in my arms, feel her head rest against my chest, her blonde curls sprawled on my neck, so full of life, of joy, of love, of purity… She had died before her sixth birthday, to say it was the hardest time in our lives was a gross, sick understatement. Words couldn't describe the pain.**

**Finally I pulled the vibrating cell out, but quickly slid it back in as I saw it was my boss. I didn't care if I was the FBI's greatest detective, according to him at least, there could be a nuclear bomb threat and I wouldn't care, nothing could move me from this spot.**

"**Mr. Jones, you can come in now," a nurse said after opening the door to **_**her**_** hospital room.**

_**Except that, of course.**_

**I rose quickly, gulping as I walked in. She was in bed, eyes closed as she leaned against her pillow, bald head covered with a scarf with a light green and purple pattern that reminded me of when we were the "meddling kids" from Coolsville, Ohio, where everyone dressed, talked, and acted like it was the seventies. She hadn't seemed to age a day to me, though if I forced myself, I could see the small crow's feet by her eyes and the laugh lines tracing her mouth, but the rest of her skin was smooth as water, fair and flawless.**

**I crossed the room to her bedside, but part of me was still afraid to touch her, as I always had been. Even bald and at forty-something, she was still beyond beautiful, breathtaking as the first time I kissed her almost thirty years ago. Her eyes opened, revealing those bottomless, clear, flaming, endless, crystalline pools of aquamarine more beautiful than anything there ever was or would be. **_**Ever**_**. They still made my heart stop, blaze, and leap as I forgot how to think, how to breathe, how to **_**blink**_**.**

"**Freddie," she managed to say, voice so soft but still heart melting and mind numbing, turning her precious head to me, smiling that soft gentle smile as her eyes sparkled the way they only did when her eyes met mine. She still filled my stomach with butterflies.**

"**Hey, Daph," I croaked, voice cracking as I knelt by her side.**

"**I missed you," she murmured, sliding her hand across the white sheet towards me.**

_**I knew I should've knocked the door down.**_

**I took it instantly, holding her long, thin, elegant, perfect, flawless fingers in both of my hands and kissing her knuckles as she closed her eyes and breathed in.**

**There had been a time where I would've asked her what she was doing. "Memorizing," she'd reply without a care in the world before looking at me, azure eyes shining. "Memorizing this moment so I never forget it. So I can look back years from now and remember this perfect… joy, and peace, and utter contentment just from simply **_**being**_**, simply **_**existing**_**, with you. Drinking it in now so I can save it for a rainy day when all hope and happiness seems lost…"**

**She half-smiled, not "probably knowing" what I was thinking; she knew. After all these years, she knew me inside and out, better than I knew myself, every thought, every feeling, every doubt, every fear, every memory, every joy, everything…**

"**I love you," I whispered, kissing her cheek, after all these years, I still expected it to ripple.**

**Her eyes closed as I kissed her. The chemo hadn't taken her eyelashes, long, thick, black, luscious, feathery, and perfect as ever, brushing her cheeks with their gentle, angelic, breathtaking grace. I kissed the tip of her nose too and her eyes opened, revealing those endless, blazing pools of crystal again, as she smiled.**

"**I love you," she whispered back, tears filling her shimmering eyes as she weakly squeezed my hand. "The kids…?"**

"**On their way," I replied, not taking my eyes off her for a second.**

_**I won't blink cause that would mean I would miss a second beside you**_**… I thought that was from a song Liz or Daphne liked. If I tried, I could remember, but it didn't matter now.**

"**So are Shaggy, Scoob, and Velma," I said, resting my forehead against hers.**

"**How is our favorite NASA scientist?" she asked with a small smile. "I haven't talked to her in a week…" she trailed off and I gently made her lean back against her pillow.**

"**You should rest," I said.**

**Her thick, perfect eyelashes fluttered open and she smiled sadly at me, a small smile that sent tears into both of our eyes.**

"**We both know I wouldn't wake up," she whispered and I fought back a sob, burying my head in the sheet that covered her lap.**

"**Don't say that…" I begged her, voice cracking as my heart, soul, and very being screamed and wailed and screeched.**

"**The doctor told you that I wouldn't make the night…""He was **_**wrong**_**," I said firmly, harshly, meeting her eyes, still flaming with that strength, spirit, and fire, even on her death bed. "You can't…""It's time, Fred. It was time months ago, we can't fight it anymore…"**

"**Yes, yes we can, Daphne. If you that have the strength, take mine, use my…"**

"**Our love's the only reason I've been able to stay here for so long. I love you, Freddie, with all my heart and soul, more than anything but our own children. But everything has a reason, and it's my time. Everyone has to die someday…"**

**I couldn't even **_**think**_** that word, refused to consider that possibility, even though it was staring me right in the face.**

"**Yes, but can't you die after I have…?" I said as tears ran down my face. "I can't bear to go through that pain…"**

"**And I can? Not every couple can die peacefully in their sleep at the same time, Fred," she said as we pressed our foreheads against each other and I sat on the bed.**

"**I love you…" I whispered. "More than I've ever loved anyone," I said, running my hand along her smooth cheek as she lied back down.**

"**I love you too, Freddie. If there's one thing I know, it's that you love me more than it's physically possible to love someone, which is exactly why I don't want you doing anything stupid."**

"**Like what? Kill myself? You're my life. The only purpose, the only hope, the only joy, the only **_**purpose**_** I've ever had. Without you, I have no reason to get out of bed, to wake up, to live, to breathe…"**

"**Yes you do," she said, eyes closed. I begged them to open, I had to see that blue flame, that passion, that strength, that spirit, that love in those endless, blue crystal pools… "Eddie and Diana, Liz, Aiden, our grandson and the grandchildren yet to come…"**

"**If our grand children won't remember you, then they shouldn't remember me. They deserve you. Daphne, if I could take your place…"**

**Her eyes opened and my ripping heart soared for one fleeting instant.**

"**You'd do it in a heartbeat, I know. But you can't, Fred. And even if you could, I'd never let you. I love you too much…"**

"**For longer than forever, Daph," I said, kissing her hand so I didn't have to take my eyes off hers, but they closed again. **

"**We'll see each other again, you know that. If we don't, there is no justice in the universe at all. But if that were so, we never would've met in the first place…"**

"**Please, don't leave me," I begged her, wrapping my arms around her and pulling her close as tears streamed down my cheeks and I sobbed into her silky scarf. "You're my bride, my angel, my one, only, true, life-long love…"**

"**I don't want to go, Freddie. I wish I could stay here with you forever…" she whispered, voice cracking as tears flowed out of her gems as well. Somehow, she found to strength to pull away enough to meet my eyes. "Promise me that you won't kill yourself, for me, for our children, our grandchildren…"**

"**I swear," I promised only because it was she that asked me, and I couldn't bear to see her beg, couldn't bear to see tears in her eyes. I held her close again and wept, heart and soul ripping and screaming. "I swear, Daphne, I swear, I swear," I sobbed over and over again in her ear.**

"**We'll be together again, I promise. This won't be the last time you hold me," she said, burying her face in my neck, making my heart ache to kiss her.**

**I kissed her forehead and each closed eyelid, resting my head on hers, listening to the sound of her breathing and to her heart beat on the machine, clinging to it for dear life.**

"**Tell the kids I love them… and Shaggy and Velma… and Scooby," she said with a sad smile at the thought of the dear, lovable, scaredy-cat Great Dane.**

"**No, no, please," I begged her, holding her close as I could.**

**She wrapped her arms around my neck, whispering in my ear.**

"**I love you and our babies more than anything, Fred Jones. I love you, Freddie…"**

**She went still in my arms and I squeezed her tightly, screaming as my soul screamed and heart ripped irrevocably in two. I yelled louder than I thought humanly possible, every vein, every cell, every particle in my body on fire as I was being burned alive. My heart turned to ash and my brain was being torn to shreds.**

**Doctors and nurses were rushing in, saying things I didn't want to hear, they didn't matter, nothing mattered, there was nothing but this pain. I felt a hand on my shoulder and I spun around, still holding Daphne in my arms but throwing the man off of me.**

**Soon, my screams were overcome with sobs and I wept, shaking, rocking back and forth. Words could not describe the pain, the emptiness, the burning… Every single word was a gross, sick, twisted understatement that mocked me. At some point, it could've been hours later, it could've been minutes, I was outside of time, surrounded by nothing but this horror of a nightmare… At some point, I heard a vaguely familiar voice whisper to me as someone touched me again.**

**I spun around to discover it was Velma, I screamed in her face anyways, overcome by raw, fierce rage, hurt, anger, and pain. Her eyes widened behind her glasses and Shaggy pulled her away. Aiden and Eddie stood next to them, but it was the look of horror in Lizzie's eyes that stopped my scream. I was a savage monster. I wept, finally letting Daph out of my arms as Liz threw her arms around me.**

"**Oh daddy, oh daddy," she cried, tears streaming down her cheek. "I love you, Daddy…"**

**I clung to her as she, Eddie, and Aden held me. I felt Scooby lick my face as Velma and Shaggy threw their arms around me as well, Diana resting a hand on my shoulder.**

**No one said anything in a vain attempt to comfort me, they knew no words could help for a second, they would only be salt in my ever-bleeding wound. The others cried and sobbed, occasionally saying Daph, Mom, Dad, I love you, Daphne, or Freddie.**

"**Oh Dad," Eddie said, voice cracking as the others finally pulled away.**

**Shaggy held Velma as she cried, burying her face in his chest, his own tears landing on her head. Scooby wailed "Raphne," resting his head on her body's lap. Aiden held Liz as they wept, Eddie holding me as I rested my head against his shoulder.**

"**I love you, Dad. We're here," Aiden said, taking my hand, eyes shining with tears. He'd always called me dad, his own father gone before he could talk.**

"**Oh, Daddy, I love you," Liz cried, throwing her arms around me.**

**My heart was still broken irrevocable, my soul empty, my life practically meaningless… But I'd stay with them, my children, for them, for Daphne. I'd see her again someday, but I could still live for her, carry out her final request. I'd be the best grandfather possible and I'd always be there for my children, I'd love them with all my heart, just as I, we always had.**

**Everyone, my family, threw their arms around me again, holding me, refusing to ever let me go, to ever stop loving me. I kissed Liz's long, thick, lustrous, crimson curls, heart aching.**

**Please review.**


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